Katalepsy at myspace

If a bunch of sissy hardcore boys make a facsimile of death metal with breakdowns and shitty gimmick vocals then it is deathcore and thus bad but if a bunch of guys singing about gore and death and whatever with long hair do the same its “slam death metal” apparently. One is the bane of extreme metal and the other is a perfectly acceptable evolution of Death Metal despite both sounding the same. As it turns out Katalepsy aren’t a bunch of pale skinny mid-western white boys with stretched ear lobes and Atticus hoodies, but a bunch of tough as nails Russian dudes.  They might as well be the former as that’s the music they make though.

I have nothing against mixing Hardcore with Death Metal when it is done with the imagination, innovation and an eye to detail that all good music is made with, let’s be honest the shit to good ratio in Deathcore is pretty high. The breakdowns on “Musick Brings Injuries” are more On Broken Wings than Obituary and the Death Metal segments are more repetitive than you would find in Bona Fide Death Metal seeming to sound like a  Down syndrome version of Mortician. There’s conveniently a Mortician cover on this album along with a hilarious Deathcore version of “Symphony of Destruction”. That means that a quarter of the time on this album is other peoples material and its better constructed than Katalepsys original tracks, which being one of the artists in question is Mortician is really saying something.

The thing that really sucks though is the vocals. What these knuckleheads want to be is more “extreme” than anyone else. They can’t play faster, heavier or more technically than anyone else, so they make the vocals more “extreme” which in this case means making them sound like a cross between a pig and a cricket and never singing in time once. Not in an endearing Paul Baloff way but in can’t go more than 5 seconds before going out of sync with the musicians. It seems that since your average deathco…. Oops I mean Slam Death musician can’t play better than anyone else that have to make the vocalist make as many silly ill fitting sounds as possible to be the most “BROOTAL”.

At the end of the day this variety of metal as exhibited by Katalepsy and their much more musically proficient but still vocally untalented forefathers Devourment has as much influence over the overall death metal scene as Velvet Caccoon or Les Legions Noire had over the Black Metal scene; a lot of dweebs on the internet talking about it, but nothing really happening. If all these “XSLAMXDEATHX” bands sound like Katalepsy, then that’s certainly a very good thing indeed.

Porkfarm at myspace

Playing a style of Death Metal very similar to Dying Fetus, Brain Drill, Necrophagist, and Beneath the Massacre, Young English Death Metal act Porkfarm display an apt control over both the brutal and technical sides of the genre. They keep the technical wizardly and the “slam” side of their sound under control displaying in where the song progresses to a point where either of them is needed but not veering off into either direction willy-nilly and it is this disciplined approach that gives this six song EP an air of supreme professionally.

At Nineteen minutes this release makes you demand more. Along with the Tech-Death and Slam influences some of the songs such as “Suffer” and “Torn Apart” have some old school influences such as vintage Morbid Angel and Deicide, and with many new bands falling into the deathcore/wigger slam trap its great to see a new band making death metal how its supposed to be made. Definitely one to watch in the future

Gnaw Their Tongues at Myspace

“An Epiphanic Vomiting of Blood” is a horrific album but in the best possible way. Mixing Doom Drone, Black Metal, Industrial, Noise and Ambient influences to make what is a very good contender for most disturbing album of the year. This Dutch one man project is often classed as Black Metal and whilst that is definitely an influence , especially with the sporadic vocals that description is definitely too limited to explain the deal with Gnaw Their Tongues.

Taking Sunn 0))) or Earth’s most depressing and primitive moments as a blueprints, Gnaw Their tongues add in harsh and aurally disfigured white noise, the aforementioned black metal vocals, an echoing malevolent string section, additional creepy keyboards, haunting slowly precise but organic drums and samples from various televised court cases, real crime TV shows and horror films to create what could be described as Jason Vorhee’s favourite chillout record.

Not that you could ever relax to this record with its claustrophobic oppressive ambience aided by the menacing strings that swirl in and out of aural focus like glimpses of something in the corner of your eye which seems to be always present but you can never quite focus on. The chilling verbal sample of a lawyer grilling a gentlemen who took it upon himself to tie up and murder a family one by one in “Teeth That Leer Like Open Graves” which what is presumably an extract from an American televised court case would creepy enough by itself but under a barrage of hypnotic low pitched guitar lines and some threatening electronic babbling its absolutely terrifying.

Along the way the album adds what appears to be a choir of witches, samples from a number station and what I think may be (it was a bit low in the mix to definitively ID) extracts from the “Wearside Jack” tape. This is the sound of human misery and depravity entwined in a sordid trawl through the dark side of popular culture. This is some fucked up shit my friends and although you won’t listen to it all the time, its worth it for the few times you do.

Jaldaboath at Myspace

When I heard that Jaldaboath (real name James Fogarty) was recording a solo EP, I was anxious to hear the results. He was a founding member of one of my favorite metal bands, The Meads of Asphodel. However, when I actually got around to hearing this EP, it turned out to be a terrible pile of hoary “medieval” cliches.

Things actually start off fairly well, with a brief intro track leading into “Bring Me the Head of Metatron.” Folk metal has never been one of my favorite subgenres, but this opening track isn’t bad at all. However, things take a turn for the worse for the next three tracks, which use cheesy synthesized “medieval” instruments and have terrible lyrics that not even a Monty Python sketch would touch.  The final track, “Da Vinci’s Code,” isn’t quite as bad as what preceded it, but it’s too late to save the EP. What I loved about the Meads was that they were always going off in different directions; not all of their experiments worked, but they were always interesting. None of that experimentation is in evidence here; it’s just cliche after cliche after cliche.

Now, I don’t hate silliness in metal. I love many bands I find to be incredibly silly; I find the anti-Christian sentiments of many bands to be hilarious, and the macho posturing of bands like Manowar sends me into conniptions. But Hark the Herald is just played too straight for me to get any laughs out of it.  If it’s meant seriously, it’s terrible. If it’s meant as a joke, it’s not funny. This is one of the most disappointing releases of 2008 in my opinion.

Zerozonic at Myspace

Although Zerozonic feature current members of Blood Red Throne and Green Carnation they have a sound that is more all American than of the frozen north. Influenced primarily by Pantera but also Black Album era Metallica, Machine Head, Snot, Black Label Society, Godsmack and present day Soilwork, this is an album that bucks the trend to turning the clock back to 1986 by turning back to 1993. Further evidence of this can be seen in the fact that in promo pictures all the members seem to have come dressed as Phillip Anselmo

Bizarrely what should on paper be quite an accessible even commercial metal album, is quite an absolutely obtuse listen. Despite being influenced by some of the most catchy and memorable (as in get stuck in your head like a Hilary Duff song you heard in burger king sort of way) bands in metal, “Dead on Arrival” is instantly forgettable. While the album still plays one can consider it a blessing that they did not choose the most straightforward and dumbed-down route, but that’s quickly dispelled by the sheer unremarkableness of the material and the occasional even more regrettable “nu” moment.

When they do stray from the usual formula with “Zero” sounding like Sonic Syndicate attempting a seven minute power ballad and “Stripped” having a middle section which sounds like Zakk Wylde masturbating onto the corpse of the genre of Barroom Blues Rock. At the end of the day all “Dead on Arrival” had to offer is “Far Beyond Driven” without the intensity or “The Black Album” without the hooks. If you already despise those two records then just think how much you will hate this one.